Happy Fathers Day

Happy Father's Day Daddy

I miss you a lot lately. You have been on my mind day and night. Maybe it's the upcoming move. Maybe it's the kids getting so big. Maybe it's just missing my dad.

We officially move in two weeks! We bought a beautiful house in Jackson and it's perfect for our family. I am over the moon excited. We need help moving though. You would have been a great help. You were always the go to guy for that kind of stuff. "You need a fridge, I'll get you one!" "Do you need couches?" "What are you going to do with your old dryer? I'll take it and I won't even charge you. Harharhar." Then I would watch you smoke a cigarette and drink out of a two liter bottle of RC which is sitting in the passenger seat of the truck. 

I can hear you now.

The kids are getting so big. Marlee is so smart. And so funny. And so sassy. You would just be in love. Nicky is my little bruiser. He is rough and sweet and nonstop. All boy! You would be so smitten by the both of them. And they would love you so much. Marlee would think you are hilarious and Nicky would be shy but you would win him over with a pack of Sno Balls. 

I have replayed this over in my mind a million times.

By the way, the Cavs won. Although I am sure you already know that. You had the best seat in the house. We won! We are champions! 

Next is the Browns. 

We might need a little extra luck from above for that one though. 

The sisters are doing great. You would be so proud. They get smarter and more beautiful everyday. Please continue to watch over them. They need it more than I do. 

I have Nick. He is the best dad to the kids. You would be happy. Happy to know how much he cares for them and how much he cares for me. Everything you could have wished for in a husband for your daughter. He misses you too. I think he wanted a call today telling him how bad the Celtics suck. 

We all miss you. We all think about you. We all love you. 

I wish we would have said it more. 

Crib Removal

Fifteen days till the big move! 

Fifteen days!

I took a little stay-cation this week so I could finish up some moving details like switching utilities, changing our address, packing unnecessary items, and really getting things organized for the big day. 

So far we have done nothing but have a whole lot of fun as you can see. 

Do not get me wrong, I would not change these moments for anything. I mean look at those faces! Pure joy.

Butttt with Nicky becoming a ninja gymnastic overnight and not only jumping out of his crib but also climbing into his sisters crib in the morning, I decided the cribs had to go. I was hoping they would last until we moved but the kids had other plans. Marlee was super excited for a big girl bed and I figured maybe this would be a good transition. We decided on mattresses on the ground would have to do for two weeks because setting up two beds just to tear them down and resetting them up at the new house was overkill in the lifting and moving and building department. 

So while the kids were quietly occupied in the living room, I took it upon myself to break down the cribs. Or at least start. Marlee was going to be so excited! 

I was about half way through Marlee's crib and Marlee came in to find me.

"Mom, wat you doin' to my crib?"

The tears forming in her eyes. 

"Marlee I am getting you a big girl bed!"

"Mommy, I don't want to be a big girl! I want to be a baby in my crib!"

Bawling. Bawling. Bawling. 

She cried and cried. It broke my heart. I really thought that she was going to be so excited and boy was I wrong. She wanted to stay a baby. I wanted her to stay a baby.

So I cried too.

We laid on her mattress and cried together until we both calmed down. She sang me a song and I played with her hair. Then we talked about her new pink room and her new princess sheets and her how wonderful the new house will be. 

She ended up helping me take down the crib and Nicky's crib too. She made sure the blankets were placed properly on the mattresses and that the pillow sat perfectly at the top. And don't forget all the stuffed animals. 

"They are my favorite part mom."

I prayed for a good night. I was hoping that she would not be scared. And that I would actually be able to get some sleep. I checked on them around midnight and both had rolled to the floor. Marlee had her legs under the dresser and Nicky was in a ball in the corner. I picked them both up and placed them back in bed. 

I gave them kisses and quietly tip toed out of the room. 

They will always be my babies. 

Crib or no crib. 

Before I Was Mom

A friend of mine posted a question on Facebook on what advice or tip you wish someone would have told you before you became a mom. I was going to write a response but it seemed like everything I said came out a bit negative. So let me start off by saying this; being a mom is the greatest challenge and blessing I have ever been given. I love my kids and I love being a mom. I just also enjoy work, wine after bedtime, and watching Netflix in silence. Being a mom is a balancing act which requires daily perfecting. These are some of the things I wish I was told before I was a mom. 

1. Being a mom is hard. And it is a type of hard you have never experienced. And it is a different type of hard. It pushes you to explore levels of yourself that you never knew existed. Babies cry. A lot. They do not care that you had a bad day. They do not care that you are exhausted. They do not care that you are still wearing yesterdays clothes which may or may not have chunks of yesterdays baby vomit on them. You will cry with them. You will wonder 'what the hell did I get myself into?' You will question if you are strong enough to go another sleepless night. You are. Your routine will change to accommodate the little monster. You will feed before eating. You will change a diaper before peeing. You will pack everything in that diaper bag that can possibly fit just to ensure that your child stays happy during your trip to the grocery store just to get there and forget your wallet (been there, done that - maybe twice). It is hard and overwhelming and you will not be sure if you are doing it right. You are. 

2. Do not listen to everyone. People are going to give you advice. Everyone is going to give you advice. Some good, some bad. And if you are anything like me, you will listen and nod and thank them. You may or may try out the advice but let me tell you something, you do not have to listen to everyone. There are all kinds of extremely passionate people who think they know the very best way to raise a child. All children are different. I have two completely opposite children. While crying it out worked for one, the other needed to be held and cuddled every night until they were ten months old. One latched like a pro while the other needed coerced for about three months. The bottom line is feed your child, let your kid sleep, let them play, and let them grow. How you are going to do this is up to you. You do not have to listen to every opinion and 'research' and methods of parenting. What ever works for you, works for you. This is not a competition. And stay off baby blog/advice boards. Trust me. People on the internet are crazy. 

3. You will dislike your husband. Ok, let me first give my husband credit where credit is due. He is incredibly helpful and attentive to the children. He changes diapers, feeds, plays, carries, entertains, and loves the kids. With all that being said, the feeling of dislike for your husband during those first months are normal. He gets to go back to work. He did not gain any weight. And during the third feeding of the night while he is still snoring, I am still trying to get baby to latch in the dark. No I did not want to smother him but I did want to nudge him a bit. Like off the bed. A nice hard nudge. Of course I would apologize but for the moment, it would be nice to have someone awake with me. Husbands try to help but sometimes it just does not cut it. I was superwoman. I could do everything myself! Which leads to the last bit of advice. 

4. Ask for help! People like to help. People naturally want to be helpful. A lot of the time though (like my husband), they are not sure how to help. So what do you need? Do you need a coffee? Ask that friend who wants to come see the baby to bring you one. Or make a coffee and take it into the next room while your husband entertains the baby. Need a little help with dinner? Hey mom, can you bring over some dinner when you come visit? Need to take a nap before your body melts into a puddle of tears and baby drool? Hubby, take over - momma needs a nap! With Marlee, I tried so hard to avoid asking for help. I birthed this child and I will take care of all her needs! She was not any persons responsibility but my own. Well that obviously backfired. I felt secluded. I was secluded. I secluded myself. I feed in the bedroom, which usually turned into nap time, which turned into feed time, and so on went the cycle. I spend a ton of time in the bedroom with Marlee. I would come out when people were over but it was exhausting and we would have to quickly go back to the bedroom for feedings. I took Marlee everywhere I went. I spent every waking moment with her. I burned myself out. Once Nicky came along, things quickly changed. I asked for help. I dropped the kids off at moms to go shopping. I took time for myself. Even if it was ten minute on the back patio drinking coffee. Ask for help. You will be a better person because of it. A happy mom makes a happy baby. 

Advice is a funny thing. It is hard to even imagine what it is like being a mom until you are actually a mom. It is easy to plan and prepare but at the end of the day, all babies are different. And babies are one thing you can plan for but everything else goes the opposite way. You have to be able to go with the flow. Day by day. Heck if you have toddlers, its hour by hour (mood swings - ugh). Plan for the unplanned. Laugh, smile, and play everyday. Hug, kiss, and cuddle. 

Tell them you love them every night and you are doing a good job. 

Supermom and CEO

I have to be honest. I am feeling a little like supermom today.

On a day to day basis, I am the family CEO. And I say this with no bragging intending. It might be the only thing Nick and I can agree on 100%. 

Marisa F. H. BSN RN CEO 

Or some kind of variation of those letters and initials. 

Today though, I am supermom. At least I feel that way. 

Dishes. Done. 

Laundry. Complete. 

Mattress cleaned and sheets changed. Check. (Marlee had an accident last night.)

Teeth of both children brushed. Cross it off the list.

Breakfast made and milk consumed.

Oh but the madness does not stop there.

I had this urge to pack up the kids closet (approximately 45 days till we move!) so I grabbed a tote from the garage and stuffed two of them till they could burst. Blankets, toys, burp cloths, winter items, and even my breast pump are ready for the move. Now I have two more totes stacked in the corner for little Nicky to climb on - labeled and ready to go. 

Keep in mind it was only 9AM by this point. Also keep in mind that mornings are my least favorite of times. Nap time being my favorite. 

So I kept the momentum going.

The kiddos needed a little attention so we read books. Ok I lie. We read the same book four times. So correction, we read one book a lot. Then we cuddled and watched a little Dora. Pretty sure I have seen that episode five times but it had puppies so both kids were content. Then it was Nicky's nap time so I went back to my super duties.

This time I moved over to doing bills for the month (yuk) and making a couple appointments. I am a little late with Nicky's 15 month check up so I scheduled that first, then my doctor appointment, and then followed up with getting some more information on Marlee's preschool. 

Marlee is going to be in preschool! 

(Insert all the shocked and surprised emoji faces)

I took this a step further, filled out her paperwork, signed a check, and sent in her registration. 

I took a deep breath because I am pretty sure supermoms do not cry. 

Is it even possible for Marlee to be old enough for school? How can I be the mom to a preschooler?! When did this happen?!

What is happening??!!! 

Ok enough of this nonsense. 

Now I am waiting for Nicky to get up from his nap so I can serve lunch (chicken nuggets are the super-est meals) and then get Marlee down for a nap. 

Then, just then, might I take a little time for myself. Nothing crazy but brushing my hair and drinking a cup of coffee would be nice. 

A hot cup of coffee. 

Supermoms need hot coffee.

Happy Easter

Happy Easter!

And a beautiful Easter it was!

Before I go any further, I have to give credit where credit is due. My husband dyed eggs, put together the Easter baskets, stuffed and hid all the Easter eggs, made a casserole for lunch at Grandmas, and cleaned the house while I worked and napped before we left. He truly is a gift from God and I am not sure how I was able to get so lucky. 

Thanks Nick. 

Anyways, I digress. Easter morning, Marlee and Nicky did a mini search around the house and Isaac joined in to find the Easter baskets. The Easter bunny brought a ton of treats, candies, and toys and the kids were thrilled. Isaac got a new baseball bag too which he helped pick out but the Easter bunny paid for. (Is that how it works?)

Marlee was running around in her underwear after he bath shouting "Mom! What's dis? Oh mom, look at dis! Mom another egg! What's in dis?". Needless to say, she was thrilled and so excited the Easter bunny finally came. Nicholas on the other hand grabbed one egg, shook it, laughed in delight, and ran into the other room. One and done. 

The day continued with an egg hunt at Grandma Wanda's house and an egg hunt at the Tozzi's house. All the kids had a blast. It is such a blessing to have all the family together. I wish we could get together more often. The baby cousins need to be close. Cousins are best friends first!

Such is life - busy, busy, busy. 

Needless to say, the kids were spoiled with clothes, chocolates, eggs, and kisses. Nothing better than seeing your kids smile. And they did. All day. Laughed, giggled, ran, and smiled. 

It was a great day.

An exhausting, wonderful day.

 

The Costello, Tozzi, Hough Clan

Happy Easter Everyone!

Jump into Spring

Spring!

A time for new beginnings, sunny days, growth, and flowers!

The smell is amazing, the grass is green (or getting there), and the windows are open (or at least cracked.)

And we bought a house!

I saved the best part for last. The long search for a house is over and we are jumping with joy. The child in me thought house shopping would be fun and exciting while the adult in me hated every minute of it. Smelly houses, shady owners, and disappointing days. 

Blah!

Finally, our time - and our dream house - arrived. We finagled a deal with friends of friends (its all about who you know!) and it made all the long days of house shopping and the disappointment of losing two deals, 100% worth it. Good things come to those who wait. We have a long closing ahead of us but we are counting down the days until we move. 

70 days!

In the meantime, we are cleaning, de-cluttering, boxing, and planning. So much to do that we are grateful for the long closing. It gives us enough time to get stuff together and make a good solid plan for moving. It also gives us a couple extra months for saving and preparing. We need a fridge and a good mover and a carpet scrubber and the list goes on and on...

The kids are super excited. Well Isaac and Marlee are super excited. Isaac is going to love the basement and the backyard while Marlee just knows that her room is pink. Which is really the only important thing when you are two. I, on the other hand, am stoked about all the extra room. The family living area and the kitchen are ideal for entertaining. Not that we even do a lot of that but the thought of having family dinners really gets me excited. I love my family and wished we got together more often - more often than holidays only. I know life is busy but to have a place for sisters and kiddos to play on Sundays would make my life whole. 

Now back to the mom life, Nicky is wanting to play and I need to empty the dishwasher. 

Next post will be an Easter post! Shopping for outfits this week! 

February Break Down

I only had to heat up my coffee once today. 

That is a good day. A great day actually. 

The children are playing band or drums or something along those lines so I am going to do a little updating on the past month and a half. 

Nicholas had his pirate party at the end of January and it was wonderful! Our house was full of family and friends. Nicky loved his birthday cupcake and all his gifts. It was simple, easy, and fun. All I could ask for to celebrate my baby turning one. 

Marlee had a blast too playing with the other children at the party. And I am pretty sure all the gifts were really hers. So in reality, it was Marlee's party but Nick was allowed to attend. Sassy toddler always wins. 

I did not get a lot of pictures because I was busy running around like a mad woman but the kids had a blast which makes everything 120% worth it. 

Thanks to all that attended! The kids absolutely adore everyone and we feel so special to have so many people that love and spoil our babies. 

Second on the list of February mania is that we are moving. Ok so we are not moving today or even tomorrow but after all of our hard work since last June to get ourselves ready to start house shopping - we were finally pre-approved for a house! We were completed over the moon with excitement! It has been a long hard journey to save, pay off debts, and get our budget in order. Finally, we did it! 

And then we found a house!

Two houses to be exact!

And we were denied both times.

Cue the sad music and tears and disappointment. 

We take all this time to save money and no one wants it. 

We thought that the saving and paying off credit cards was going to be the hard part but we were wrong. Actually finding a house is the hard part. We have seen maybe a dozen houses at this point and searched online for a million more without any luck. We are staying optimistic though. Spring is right around the corner which is going to bring a better market of houses. 

Our dream house is out there! Somewhere. 

My goal is to be completely moved in to our new house by Marlee's birthday in July. 

Marlee gets a new house for her birthday.

She is a princess after all.

Since Nick has turned one, our routines and schedules have really been on point. He has been napping (for the most part) everyday and I have been able to plan breakfast and lunch around his and Marlee's nap time. I know this sounds simple but its not. Which is why it has taken me a year to figure it out! We have also implemented the cage for early morning containment which looks like a torture device but in reality, it is a sanity keeper. We have to get ready in the morning somehow and the cage is the winner. 

And if we don't cage, this happens. 

This boy is fearless. And all boy. 

He still loves his food. All the foods.

And Marlee is turning into a teenager before my eyes. I was talking too loud so she got her headphones. Sorry to bother you, my dear princess.

These two love each other. Marlee says Nicky is her best friend and Nick thinks Marlee has beautiful hair (he pulls it frequently). They are going to grow even closer as they get older. I love it. It makes my heart so full. 

Never a dull moment with these two.

Actually, they now found me and my coffee is empty so it is back to work.

Or play.

Depends on how you look at it.

Have a good February everyone!